Hinkley Point nuclear plant given go-ahead.

[KKOB]

THE government has approved the building of a nuclear power station at Hinkley Point because if anything should go wrong it only affects Bristol.

The power station, a new design built by the Chinese to see if it works properly before they build any at home, has a 15 per cent risk of catastrophic meltdown but only a 0.0015 per cent risk of harming anyone who would be greatly missed.

Energy secretary Greg Clark said: “Nuclear materials can make areas uninhabitable for decades – even centuries – to come, which is why we have sited this potential disaster next to a major city of middle-aged men in Supreme baseball caps and kindly-yet-hopeless trustafarian couples pursuing doomed puppet-related art projects.

“Even in the event of a full meltdown, we’d only lose Minehead Butlins. If we time it for a Back To The 80s weekender we’d get rid of Tight Fit into the bargain.”

[Colwyn]

It was later announced in Parliament by Culture Secretary Karen Bradley that, following the highly successful move to make the BBC pay for the Government's policy of "free" licences for over-75s, the cost of the Chinese building the new nuclear disaster area at Hinkley Point would be borne by the Corporation as part of its new Royal Charter.

[Somerset Simon]

A good decision for the area and local jobs, whether it will ever generate electricity is still the big question. Living less than 10 miles away the risk of the continued extension of Hinkley B's life, which was built 40 years ago is more important as it is old technology and will still be required for many years.

[Somerset Simon]

And Cardiff is closer to Hinkley than Bristol!