Starting with the beer. How dare you sir! ... yes how dare you compare within a paragraph Carlsberg (brewed in Northampton) euro-lagerpop with one of the greatest of British Beers, Fullers LONDON Pride. Pure, pure, food, that it is ...... chestnut in colour, the thinnest of bright white head, and flat as witches t*t, and a taste so divine that it must have some weakness somewhere, and that is that it does not travel outside the M25 ... and do not doubt me on the latter point, it is a proven scientific fact, cos my mate told me that, and he is a doctor!
As to the spurious cider west country claim. May I remind you sir, of the Garden County of England, famed for its apples and cider, yes the beautiful county of Kent, and lets not forget that it is also the best hops growing area too. And who can forget the great Sussex robbery, when the King of Ciders, MERRYDOWN, was shifted down to Gloucestershire way from Heathfield, East Sussex, to teach them carrot crunchers 'ow te make zider!! Legend also has it that it was Merrydown that inspired Adge Cutler to sing 'Drink up 'e zider' (for tonight we'll MERRY be), and if it is good enough for 'The Avonmouth Bard' (my lover!!) then surely it should be recognised as such by an old Bristolian - via Wales boyo - like yourself.
Mind you what all that has to do with the UKIP PPB I don't know, but hopefully some kind soul will get us back on track by, for example, mentioning the 35,000 Syrian refugees sitting at the Turkish border ?