GOMs: Shock Revelations

[Colwyn]

GRUMPY OLD MEN SCANDAL
FRAUD & DECEIPTION
SMOKE & MIRRORS
A national survey by the Office for National Statistics that people over 65 are some of the happiest and most satisfied in the country and not grumpy at all. It seems this has been all an act to cover up their contented existence from public scrutiny. Although people, on average, scored their life satisfaction at 7.4 out 10 those between 65 and 75 scored much higher on this count and on the "worthwhileness" of their lives and whether they were "happy" yesterday. Apparently, so-called GOMs have been sniggering behind their hands at the rest of the poulation, all along.

Some opponents of the ONS survey say the truth is much different. They claim that grumpy old men and (and women) lied to the young researchers conducting the survey in order to wind them up. Well, you wouldn't put it past the miserable old gits would you? However, the ONS responds that if these deceptions made the GOMs feel happy, and left them sniggering behind their hands at the rest of the population, then it wouldn't make a blind bit of difference anyway.

[Scunner]

Well maybe it depends on how the question was asked. If the question was "Is this better than being dead" I can imagine many old gits being in agreement. Not all of course but you can't please everyone.

[Colwyn]

I can see that as being a good wind-up answer. "Were you happy yesterday?" "No, not yesterday, I was dead yesterday you know, today's much better".

[KKOB]

"What do you hate most about being old?"

"Being asked stupid questions by **nkers from the Office for National Statistics who have IQs just above room temperature."