warning

[creativeproducer]

a gentle warning for all those who eat at [temporarily removed]. Don't trust [temporarily removed], with anything apart from your order. Definitely not your daughter, sister, friend or anything financial. sorry to post something so negative but i wished someone had warned me...

[Scunner]

I'm afraid you would need to justify that for it to stay - you can't just write not to trust someone and expect it to stay on a pubic forum. We'd have anarchy if that was acceptable.

I'll give you till 3pm to decide what you want to do.

[creativeproducer]

Ok. he 'sorted' an apartment for my stay which was in bad condition, and then disappeared without sorting out certain essentials, or giving me the apartment owner details. he apparently wanted to have a relationship on the basis of being separated, which i have since found out he's not. fortunately for i have hardly seen him and was not emotionally involved with him. but friends here (turkish &english) have since warned me he has a pattern of doing this. i have had emails in the last day from other women that he has behaved badly towards, and as a lost 300 lira having to move out of the crap apartment early, i don't want anyone to go through the same.

[Scunner]

With due respect, the man you are talking about is a waiter - if you want somewhere to stay that isn't "in bad condition" and a property manager who won't disappear without "sorting out certain essentials" then a property management company is the place to go. You wouldn't go to ask the staff at your local UK McDonalds if you needed a place to rent.

I'm sure you feel sore about the service you received but to be honest you got the service many on here would expect when you avoid the professionals.

I have had dealings with many waiters, although not the one you mention, in the similar area of property purchase. They bring their "friends for years" to the office to make sure they get the "Turkish price". Then in Turkish say that if £5,000 isn't added to the price for them, they'll take their "friends for years" to someone else.  

I won't serve your lunch if they keep out of my business. Sadly they can't.

[creativeproducer]

i agree, and had actually organised an apartment through an estate agent previously, so i take responsibility for trusting someone else. the reason for the post was the more disturbing stories i've heard since, which would have happened to me too, if i had let them. obviously people need to look out for themselves, but he has got a good reputation on here, as someone who will 'look after you'. and to be balanced i have met some amazing people here, who have looked after me extremely well. i don't wish to become cynical. it's entirely your choice whether you keep the post, and i respect your decision either way.

[Scunner]

I think you might agree that a story about an apartment that wasn't up to the standard you had hoped for doesn't actually warrant a post warning people not to trust their daughter with the named man. The story envisaged from you posting that was far more sinister. I assume this is one of the stories you have heard.

[creativeproducer]

i am trying to be slightly discreet. but i take your point. and yes, i have heard them but also based on his treatment of me whilst i have been here. i don't know if sinister is the right word, but i have certainly been put in a dangerous situation by him at least once since i have been here, which another local helped me out of. he is known for taking the daughters and friends of people who live here for a drink, to look after them. and from what i know of him, he will do far from that. because i am here alone, you can appreciate that i do not want to say more, and as i said, if that invalidates my posts, thats ok.

[Scunner]

We are not here to brush unsavoury stories under the carpet and paint Calis or Turkey as Utopia; but equally we can't have a free for all forum of whispers and vague hints that someone is bad. If you are confident in your story post it - warts and all (but not hearsay) and the accused can have the right of reply. People here know that if I had a problem with someone I'd tell all on here.

If you prefer to warn people who want to be warned and keep it a little more discreet that is fine and understandable too - people who feel they might need to know can contact you via private message for information.

[creativeproducer]

the only reason i don't is i am afraid of a comeback, if i post specifics. i'm not here to make enemies or to put myself in danger and i have good reason to believe that would be the case. but as i said, i see your point.

[kizkucuk]

I saw this when it was first posted so saw the restaurant and the name of the waiter concerned.  I've know the man in question for a number of years and belive he is happily married with a young child. I'm sure most of us at sometime have been offered help by our waiter friends and some of us will have chosen to accept that help.  Even if we are warned we are so dazzled by the kindness (occasionally the chocolate brown puppy dog eyes and the big smile) that the words fall on deaf ears. There are good people and bad people everywhere.   Choose your friends wisely and as Scunner pointed out get the right man for the job - if you want property advice ask an estate agent. It is easy to forget common sense when you are in a foreign country - if you wouldn't do it in the UK don't do it here.