My mate said 'I hate it when people question my statements'.
I replied 'Really?'
My mate is a bit of a prick.
Rick.
A mate of mine has been thinking about installing a HD television in his fridge.
How cool would that be?!
I'm after painting a picture of a flower blooming from an embryonic shoot.
I'm a budding artist.
I got one of those slow cookers the other day. By nine o'clock I was so hungry I gave her the sack
My mate's got a one armed butler,
Serves him right
My amnesiac friend keeps knocking on her own front door and then going in round the back to answer her own knocks.
I don't think she realises what she's letting herself in for.
And the old ones are always best:D
Two owls are sitting in a tree.
The first one announces "I'm getting married!"
To which the second replies "You twit, to who?!"
