Johnny had a swearing problem and his father was getting tired of it. He decided to ask a shrink what to do. The shrink said that since Christmas was coming up that he should ask Johnny what he wanted Santa to bring him and if Johnny swore he should leave a pile of dog sh1t in place of the gift.
So, two days before Christmas Johnny"s dad asked Johnny what he wanted. Johnny said, "I want a ******g teddy-bear laying right ******g here beside me when I ******g wake-up Christmas morning. Then when I go downstairs I want to see a ******g train going around the ******g tree, and when I go outside I want to see a ******g bike leaning up against the ******g garage."
On Christmas morning Little Johnny woke up and rolled over into a big pile of dog sh1t. Confused, he walked downstairs and saw a bunch of dog sh1t around the Christmas tree. Scratching his head, he walked outside and saw a huge pile of dog sh1t by the garage.
When he walked back inside with a curious look on his face, his dad smiled and asked, "So Johnny, what did Santa bring you this year?"
Johnny replied, "I think I got a dog but I can't find the **cker!"