Calis Beach and Fethiye Turkey Discussion Forum

General Topics => The Debating Chamber => Topic started by: Colwyn on April 13, 2009, 14:34:07 PM

Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: Colwyn on April 13, 2009, 14:34:07 PM
Our back lane has plenty of room for parking cars. Which is what most of my neighbours do. However, outside my house there is a hollow some 15 ft long, 5 ft wide and 1&1/2 to 2 ft deep. I have planned to fill it to make extra parking. Last week we had builders in to dig out footings for foundations for a conservatory. Just the opportunity I wanted so I spent nearly all of Saturday digging layers of the trench rubble into the hole, stamping down to firm it, another layer of rubble and more stamping, and so on until it was ready for a final layer of topsoil. More stamping and raking and it was level and ready for sowing with grass seed. A pretty good day's work I thought.

This morning Hilary was in the garden and saw a chap with a wheelbarrow coming along the lane. She went out to ask him his business. "Oh" says he "I am going to help myself to some of this topsoil for my garden". Apparently he then got rather snotty when she told him he couldn't have it. "Well you wouldn't miss a just a bit would you?".

To what is the world coming when you have to protect from soil bandits? Neighbourhood Watch is now on the case.
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: heather07 on April 13, 2009, 14:49:18 PM
One of the "I need it you should just give me it brigade"

It is not often it happens but when it does it leaves you speechless.

My gripe is with a man who stays up the road from me.,  He takes his di=og out several times a day.  Poor man has to ride an invalidity scooter and the dog runs along quite happily.  Until it gets to my car and then it insists on peeing against my tyres.  What does little invalid man do?  he stops and lets it[:(!][:(!]
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: ted molloy on April 13, 2009, 15:27:00 PM
I am unfortunate to have a dippy hippy as a near neighbour who owns a dog called "Merlin", the poor dog never got taken out for walks instead he got kicked out every morning to fend for himself all day , each day without fail the dog would come around to the rear of my property and deposit the biggest Richard you have ever seen so i started to bag it up and deliver it to the dippy hippy through his letter box.
The dog is now taken out for walks and kept in his own yard so Merlins magic works.: :)
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: heather07 on April 13, 2009, 15:32:05 PM
Well done Ted!!!!!!
Unfortunately that won't work for me.  I could go and pee on his invalid chair but that would cause me embarassment.  My favourite idea is to hook my car up to some electrics and wait for the yelp: :)
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: Eric on April 13, 2009, 15:45:29 PM
Smear some Extra Hot Tabasco sauce on your tyres, when he sniffs it before he pees he should get a surprise: :)
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: kevin3 on April 13, 2009, 15:55:54 PM
Colwyn.you should use this chap in your footings.
Heather07.Hook them both up to your back bumper and take them walkies.
Ted.If you were a good neighbour you would share some of yours with them


Any one else I can help?? [?] :) :)
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: cef on April 14, 2009, 09:25:36 AM
quote:
Originally posted by kevin3

Colwyn.you should use this chap in your footings.
Heather07.Hook them both up to your back bumper and take them walkies.
Ted.If you were a good neighbour you would share some of yours with them


Any one else I can help?? [?] :) :)


Now That's a tempting offer Kev  ;)
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: kevin3 on April 14, 2009, 10:38:13 AM
Behave.!!! :-\ :-\:D
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: cef on April 15, 2009, 08:41:43 AM
:D LOL That's Not, my problem :P ;)
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: kevin3 on April 15, 2009, 12:46:24 PM
: :):D:D:D
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: Colwyn on May 31, 2009, 10:56:14 AM
This morning Hilary was listening to The Archers (she is an addict). Walking past I overheard Linda Snell trying to blag herself a pile of topsoil. Its catching. It will be a crimewave soon. Watch out you could become loamless, or suffer clay deficit, and be asking "earthenwhere?" and blaming the dirty, muddy soil bandits.
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: mike A on May 31, 2009, 11:12:41 AM
I would turf the sods out.  ;)
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: kanga on May 31, 2009, 14:53:33 PM
someones a grass here
kanga
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: Highlander on May 31, 2009, 18:56:51 PM
Forive me Colwyn, but why are you parking on grass ?
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: Colwyn on May 31, 2009, 19:48:00 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Highlander

Forive me Colwyn, but why are you parking on grass ?

Because I am an honest citizen and smoking it is illegal.

Anyway I am not parking on grass yet since, due to certain medical irregularities, I have not been able to prepare the seedbed. But it will happen soon. And then I shall sow seeds. And then the grass shall grow. And then I shall park my car upon it. And then the heavenly host shall gather around me and transport my person to a better place ... and then I won't need a bloody parking spot at all.
Title: Damned Cheek
Post by: kevin3 on May 31, 2009, 20:21:46 PM
And then,on the seventh day the neighbours dogs shall shat on it.