Calis Beach and Fethiye Turkey Discussion Forum

General Topics => All things that have nothing to do with Turkey => Topic started by: heatherhanum on March 04, 2011, 20:26:54 PM

Title: childrens jokes
Post by: heatherhanum on March 04, 2011, 20:26:54 PM
Can anyone tell me some jokes which I can tell my 6 year old grandson. He particularly likes the kind that go why did the chicken cross the road. I only know one joke and he thinks it's so funny he keeps asking me for more but I dont know any.:D
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: KKOB on March 04, 2011, 20:34:45 PM
If you just Google "WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?" you'll get hundreds of hits. Some of them are rubbish and the rest are just cr4p.
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Scunner on March 04, 2011, 20:39:10 PM
Not when you are 6 KKOB. Don't you remember the 1920s?
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: heatherhanum on March 04, 2011, 20:44:57 PM
No KKOB they are all rubbish and I don't just want why did the chick but other like this one. Why was the washing machine dirty? because he took the pee out of the pants. Thats the one that had my grandson rolling on the floor laughing.
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Scunner on March 04, 2011, 20:45:51 PM
What's pink and hangs out your underpants?

Your mum!
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Steve (redding43) on March 04, 2011, 20:53:01 PM
What do you get if you sit under a cow
A pat on the head

Which bird do you eat with every meal
A swallow

What do you call a reindeer that can't see
No idea (no eye deer)

What is a rabbits favourite music
Hip hop

2 packets of crisps walking down the road
A guy stops in a car and says 'want a lift'
They said 'no thanks were walkers'

All courtesy of my son
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Scunner on March 04, 2011, 20:55:38 PM
Steve Redding, a true pro!
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Steve (redding43) on March 04, 2011, 20:57:02 PM
What do you call a man with a shovel on his head
Doug

What do you call a man with no shovel on his head
Douglas
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Scunner on March 04, 2011, 21:00:07 PM
What do you call a man in the sea with no arms or legs

Bob
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Scunner on March 04, 2011, 21:01:25 PM
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head

Cliff
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: heatherhanum on March 04, 2011, 21:03:30 PM
Brilliant thanks guys they are funny x
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Steve (redding43) on March 04, 2011, 21:08:05 PM
Not a joke as such but this poem cracks my son up every time:


The Spot on My Bum


Good grief! This spot on my bum,
I've squeezed it so much that my cheeks
Have gone numb.
It's big and it's red
With a big yellow top,
I've squeezed it with pliers,
But still it won't pop!
I've soaked it in water,
I've put on some cream.
Mum had a squeeze
Which just made me scream.
I can't sit down now,
The pain is quite dire,
My spot is glowing
And my bum is on fire!
I cried to my mum,
"Just one last try, please!"
So mum, with a grip like Superman,
Started to squeeze.
Yes, mum had hold of my spot
With a vice-like grip,
My eyes they were popping
And I was biting my lip.
My body started shaking without restraint,
My legs they wobbled,
I started to faint.
Then my mum cried out with such distaste
Because my spot, like a time-bomb,
Had exploded in her face!

Title: childrens jokes
Post by: heatherhanum on March 05, 2011, 09:14:49 AM
Very funny thank you all.x
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: DianeT on March 05, 2011, 09:24:14 AM
How did the monkey make some toast?

He put it under the gorilla!!!

My 7 year niece thinks that's great, but I think it is the only joke she knows, so heard it a few times while looking after her last night :D
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: Julesp on March 05, 2011, 15:10:53 PM
Quote
Originally posted by redding43


What do you call a reindeer that can't see
No idea (no eye deer)

What do you call a reindeer that cant see and has no legs?
Still no idea
Title: childrens jokes
Post by: welshbrickie on March 05, 2011, 17:03:30 PM
2 fish in a tank and 1 says to the other how do ya drive this!!