Calis Beach and Fethiye Turkey Discussion Forum
General Topics => Jokes => Topic started by: keng38 on May 10, 2014, 12:12:50 PM
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Post your unknown fact about Calis and the area here.
(Disclaimer - all these facts are made up, hence why in the joke section)
The name Calis comes from the ottoman times. When a dignitary visited the area, he walked barefoot on the sand and started singing. Soon everyone started to join in, hence the name Calis beach (song beach).
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The central bank of Turkey sets the currency exchange rate by the average price charged for 70cl of Efes in the Calis area. The more the tourists pay, the better the rate of exchange.
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In the late 1970's the then Radio 1 DJ Simon "master" Bates held a "Radio 1 Roadshow" on Calis Beach as a practice run before touring the UK in the summer. Unfortunately only seven people and 2 stray dogs attended so the show was cancelled. However in the UK it was a success and ran for many years.
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Unfortunately only seven people and 2 stray dogs attended
The dogs are thought to have still been there This Winter
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Famous singer Marti Pellow from chart topping band Wet Wet Wet penned the classic song "Sweet little mystery" after a holiday in Calis. He bought some local confectionary from the Sunday Market on his last day for the plane home and after eating them all on his journey discovered that they were not available in the UK.
He still visits the market regularly, even after several years, to try and find them again.
They are now discontinued.
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The Dolphin roundabout used to be a shallow fountain until 1923.
After the "Great Winter Storm" a sea surge deposited two Dolphins into the fountain before it receded.
The local village folk managed to keep them alive for 2 years before they sadly passed away.
A Dolphin memorial was then erected on the newly built roundabout to honour them.
Sadly it has now been recently removed.
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'Plaji' is the old Turkish word for bin.
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David Dickinson stole the catchphrase "Cheap as chips" from a Calis Sunday Market trader.
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The Turks invented Ayran to confuse the Brits in to thinking it was milk.
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When ladies of a certain age holiday in Calis, they turn into beautiful young nymphs, attracting all the local lads.
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Rubbing or putting your hand on your belly and saying 'Just eaten, mate, thank you' to the waiter that implores you into his restaurant on the prom, is in fact WW1 coded messaging to indicate your are a spy.
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Calis dolmus used to be horse drawn and a Calis by-law states that current dolmus must travel at the same speed.
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When ladies of a certain age holiday in Calis, they turn into beautiful young nymphs, attracting all the local lads.
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This most definitely should be used in the holiday brochures. ;D
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A law was passed that ALL meals should be served with rice and salad.
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It's a well known fact locally that if you enter a beach hut at night you could come face to face with the local bear.
This has been documented in that well known and without doubt the most factual newspaper in the world - The Daily Mirror.
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A few years ago, a wealthy paraglider was blown off course from Babadag mountain and landed on Calis beach.
Unfortunately he broke his leg upon landing and as he sat waiting for an ambulance discovered it was the perfect spot for a beachfront restaurant.
Six months later the Sat Club was built.
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Every single waiter and barman working in Calis and every single boat moored in Fethiye harbour appeared in the James Bond film Skyfall
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When using the water taxi to return to Calis from Fethiye, the next one leaves in 5 minutes.
Using the equation 5 = 7 to 29.
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Every barman and waiter in Calis are estate agents, and whats more if you do buy the property, they will go with you FREE OF CHARGE to help you buy the furniture.
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Most of the Turkish men hanging around bus stations, chatting up British female tourists actually own at least one hotel.
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In Calis, for every 100 people who have never met you but have an opinion of you they heard from someone else, 100 of those opinions will be that you are a git.
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In Calis, for every 100 people who have never met you but have an opinion of you they heard from someone else, 100 of those opinions will be that you are a git.
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oops sorry
That one is a fact!!
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In Calis, if you buy a designer item you can guarantee it is genuine.
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In Calis, if you buy a designer item you can guarantee it is genuine.
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And that includes all the perfumes, sold out of suitcases on the street.
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On some items the pricing system does not work on different levels ybanji's really do pay the same price as Turkish people .
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That "special Turkish friend" you brought with you to make sure you don't get ripped off when buying a property would never ask the agent to put £5,000 on top of the price for him.
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Calis used to have a nice, clean beach,...... probably, maybe , I think !! But the last dinosaur tore it up !!
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A male friend of mine had a Turkish guy kiss him on both cheeks. When he looked in the mirror later, his beard had been stolen. I ALWAYS count my fingers after shaking hands.
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You will be able to believe every single word you hear and your rose coloured specticles will never dull in Calis
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There is a legal limit to the number of passengers on a dolmus.
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You are right, H. I believe it is 49.
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That may well be the case Menthol but I would readily believe that the small print says 49 assuming that there are no (i) medium sized fridges and/or (ii) the old gentleman (who just lives 1/2 mile off the designated route)'s monthly supply of potatoes on the said dolmus at the time ;)
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It's still amazing though, how after all of these, mostly light-hearted postings, there is still a strange magnetism about the place, which keeps on attracting all of us !! 8) ;D
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Yes and that is, above all else, the reason behind the success of CBF. Over the years we have regularly debated and tried to pinpoint what that secret hold might actually be (without success) but there is something that I don't believe you feel in other countries - or even some other Turkish resorts.
I have personally, and I have no concerns about sharing this, stood at the gate at Dalaman for our flight home, and told Steph this might be the last time we are in Turkey. Or at least the last time for a very long time. Then we get home and within a few weeks I've booked flights for next year.
Amazing place.
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Heroin is legal in Calis. But only for tourists and only when added in very small doses into food at selective restaurants.
This creates a "Feel good factor" in the area and makes people want to come back.
Some people even decide to live here as they are that addicted.
Occasionally the Dolmus drivers accidentally eat the "Tourist food" and.... well... Enough said.
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Every Jeweller will clean your jewellery for free...Of course you are under no pressure to buy a piece of jewellery and if you do buy said jewellery, when you get it back to the U.K. It will be valued at at least three time more than you paid for it.
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Torture chambers are cunningly disguised as banks.(garanti)
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When you go to pay the rates, water or electric bill, Turkish men will not push in the queue.
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