Author Topic: english children schooling in turkey and health  (Read 6373 times)

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Offline BM06

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #30 on: March 04, 2010, 18:55:32 PM »
Kieth, eloquently put and hope caz takes your points on board, but after 10 years in this area i still find it hard to believe that this goes on year after year just crazy.

Offline Scunner

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #31 on: March 04, 2010, 19:10:22 PM »
Again I can only comment on my previous experiences, but it seems each individual British woman understands there are other British women who's dreams quickly fell apart but they found "the good one". At this time (as in now, today) not one of them will listen to a single word of advice from people who do know a bit about the subject. Such people will be seen as stirrers, poking their nose in, maybe because they can't bear to see anyone happy, or some other way to justify why they are trying to wreck their future as opposed to being genuinely concerned at the tunnel vision they see before them.

Make a list; relationships of this nationality combination that worked, those that didn't. Even us hardened onlookers didn't see some of them turning to dust, but most did. I'm not anti at all, I know some stunningly successful relationships and marriages of this type, but they did take more than a fortnight or two to get to know each other - in fact they mostly took a number of years.

It's a very high risk plan, and sadly the stats prove that :(

Offline Karennina

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #32 on: March 04, 2010, 19:15:16 PM »
Yes I too have heard that same thing Rindaloo about needing the father's permission, the reason I had heard it before was again a mother was planning to take her child to live in Turkey with her new love of five minutes and did not think she was going to get the permission from the dad to do so!

Offline peecee

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« Reply #33 on: March 04, 2010, 20:44:46 PM »
To be honest i don't agree with Scunner's opinion very often but have to say on this I do.  PLEASE think seriously about this Caz, your children would fall way behind in their schooling as opposed to schooling in the UK.  Their futures here would be very bleak with regards to jobs etc (come out here in Winter and see the amount of young people unemployed, there are no jobs!), they would have no friends/interaction with kids of their own age until they learnt the language.  You would probably have to live with the boyfriends family (unless he has his own house) and there is a definite pecking order!.  And, unless he is very cosmopolitan in his outlook and education you will find your opinions, thoughts, desires etc. really not worth much.  So many ladies come and get disillusioned very quickly.  Then you're stuck unless you have enough money to go back to something.  Turkey is great for a holiday. Unless you have the finances for independence and a reasonable standard of living it could be quite dire.

Offline minimoo

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #34 on: March 04, 2010, 21:00:08 PM »
I have to agree on some of the points raised here. I myself was a single mother who moved here. Very luckily for me, my man is a good man, and 6 years down the road we are still together, and he is very much a father to my son. I am also lucky to be in the position that I have my parents living here full time. If at any time, my son had said he was unhappy here, I would not have hesitated to take him back to the UK. I feel it was always quite fortunate that prior to my move to Turkey, I did not have access to the internet, as I think it is very easy to come across as something you are not, and equally as easy to hide things about your life. Myself and my husband had to make more of an effort to keep in touch, many,many phone calls (mostly from him) and loads of letters were exchanged. My husband also spent a lot of time with my parents here while I was back in the UK, and received their approval.

 With regards to education, my son does exceptionally well here at school, however, we have made the decision that when he completes school here, which will be in a couple of years, we will return to the UK as a family, and enroll my son at school to do his G.C.S.E's. I am very aware that he may possibly need some outside tutoring to enable him to do this, and am quite prepared to get this extra help for him. My thinking in doing all of this is that he will then have qualifications which are more recognisable than the Turkish school diploma, my son has always said that he wants to attend college and university in the UK (and learn to drive there funnily enough!) and also it will improve his job prospects.

Having said all of that, there have been advantages for my son living here. The climate has completely cleared his eczema, which blighted his life from birth until we moved here, he is now fluent in 2 languages and keen to learn another, and he has also become very self confident, and more of a leader, whereas in the UK, he was a follower.


Offline peecee

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #35 on: March 05, 2010, 10:20:52 AM »
Minimoo, thank you for your post and I'm really glad that yours is a 'success' story. You obvously spent the time and effort getting to know each other before making the decision
But, as we know, there are quite a number of stories that don't end so happily and I can't help but feel that it would sad to uproot 3 children from their friends, schools, family, prospects etc. without first finding out if a holiday relationship/acquaintance is THE love of my life.

Offline incir

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #36 on: March 05, 2010, 10:38:36 AM »
I have to agree with Scunner and Peecees comments. It's just selfish madness to uproot children like that for a man you don't even know. Sorry if that sounds harsh but I too have seen this all before.  

I met my husband 15 years ago.  Like you Minimoo we had no access to skype or msn or any of those things - and meant lots of effort on both sides for calls/letters/visits etc.  We didn't get married after a year, either.

Offline pookie

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #37 on: March 05, 2010, 12:06:11 PM »
Cas - you haven't come back on to comment....?  The guys aren't being overly harsh - sadly us that 'know' Turkey (and not just Turkey I might add !) have seen so many dreams shot down in flames, that I think the warnings should be heard.  Yes, it can work out, but far too many don't.  I wish you all the very best in what ever you decide - I'm sure as a Mum you will decide to do whatever is best for the children.

Offline peecee

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #38 on: March 07, 2010, 11:19:21 AM »
Everything gone quiet then?

Offline cheers

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english children schooling in turkey and health
« Reply #39 on: March 07, 2010, 14:21:21 PM »
I seriously hope Cas has had a re-think and only leaves for a holiday tomorrow!

Keep thinking about what is going to happen to the kids!!

 :o :o :o




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