Hi Karen,
I don't know what forums you have been reading but I don't know of any women that are frightened by Turkish men. I am frightened for the women when I hear the smooth patter of the local barmen, but the girls themselves are anything but frightened.
Kerb crawling happens everywhere, I have heard stories of it here but in truth they are looking for what you think they are - they aren't looking at it from you, you are just walking in a place where maybe such 'services' can be obtained?
I wouldn't advise women to walk anywhere alone after dark, but given the choice I'd send 'er indoors walking home from the bar here before choosing to send her home on her own in the UK.
Regarding schools, my little terrors actually started school in Fethiye (i.e they were too young for school when we lived in the UK) - the school is fantastic, we love it, the kids adore it and we have two 5 year olds that will learn about more than volcanoes and algebra, they will learn respect and manners.
Kids learn Turkish amazingly quickly so integration with Turkish children isn't much of an issue. Having said that, ours would play for hours with Turkish children before they knew a word of Turkish. Playtime - a language free zone?
Trouble is, they are nearly fluent at 5 years old and their dumb parents are certainly not. So when one was told off by their mother for telling the other to 'shut up' their conversation turned instantly to Turkish - you can't win!
The fear you say you feel in the UK is commonplace, here it is not - and your real friends here are always there for you.
Hope that helps
Scunner
p.s. what is the Turkish for shut up, I'll get the little sods