Author Topic: interfering family  (Read 16308 times)

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Offline joyandgary

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #40 on: October 10, 2013, 13:23:24 PM »
Give it a go! Rent for several months including through the winter before deciding to buy. If, after a few years, you decide to come back you'll be happier that you had the experience. Good luck!

Well said , good advice taken , and than you very much for your post  regards joy



Offline joyandgary

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #41 on: October 10, 2013, 13:26:23 PM »
I'd rather be scared than bored! Go for it, it's YOUR life and so much shorter than we think. . . I hate tight routine and love freedom and acting on impulse, always been the same. Life is for living and the choices are yours. No need to hurt anyone, just make the most of it.    :)

You are so right , thank you , we will make the most of it and enjoy it too along the way . cheers joy and gray

Offline joyandgary

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #42 on: October 10, 2013, 13:30:09 PM »
Welcome to Fethiye Joy and Gary when you eventually get here. We never really knew what our families thought when we made the decision to take early retirement and move here. They kept there cards close to there chests. But after almost 7 lovely years living in Fethiye town, they have all visited us, some quite a few times and all realise why we chose to live here. So do what your hearts tell you and I hope you really enjoy the pleasures that many of us have.

Thank you stagazer , nice reading , im sure we will enjoy it as you do , cheers joy and Gary

Offline joyandgary

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #43 on: October 10, 2013, 13:34:15 PM »
Well, I don't know about you Joy and Gary and WordBird and everyone else, but I feel a nice warm glow coming on after reading this thread.

(It could be a hot flush mind.)
   

Yes us too , very nice feeling and having  you and others that have posted their thoughts on  this subject ,it lovely to know you have others that think as we do , it does warm your heart .

Offline suecheshireuk

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #44 on: October 13, 2013, 17:46:13 PM »
When we moved out to Turkey that caused a family rift. The kids, both grown up with their own lives said go for it, you don't know what's round the corner, but my siblings were furious that they were being left with the responsibility of Mum, who although in her 80"s is fit, healthy and pretty independent. Thankfully the rift is now healed, and I actually speak to Mum more now than I did when I was in the UK and working long hours. I think in a lot of cases its a case of the green eyed monster rearing its ugly head, but its only been hard work and investing our money wisely that allowed us to retire early and enjoy the life we have. Sue xx

Offline Menthol

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #45 on: October 13, 2013, 18:02:50 PM »
Sort of had my first taster of this on Friday.

Went to see my Dad. He and my Mum divorced over 30 years ago but are really good friends. They still live in the same village so see each other a lot. My dad is 83, still independent but starting to forget things.

My Mum (77) is really excited about us buying the Turkish property and she will be coming out with me and my daughter next week again for the second time.

My Dad though ..... he asked me on Friday about the house. How big etc, etc and then said, 'You're going to live there aren't you? Permanently.'

I said we probably would be doing that eventually. But he just got really upset and said that he would be 'one of those old people with no one who ever comes to see them'. I have a brother with 2 sons and a wife that my Dad thinks the world of. There's my Mum and there's my 3 kids too. He also has a sister.

Still found it very upsetting. I feel quite quilty. My Dad will not entertain the idea of visiting anywhere abroad. Ever.

Offline tuzlachap

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #46 on: October 13, 2013, 18:45:31 PM »
We had a similar problem with Mrs TC's parents. Father in his late '80's, mother in her early '80's. Said back in 2003 that they would never see their daughter again, (though we have been visiting them for two weeks plus every year for the last 10 years!). and then there are the regular phone calls  back and forth. This last UK holiday we introduced them to Skype, but as yet they do not have a computer, that's our next task, bringing them into Silver Surfer mode.

But can we get them to actually visit us here in Fethiye?? No way. It's just the vague references from, "it's a foreign place" to " well, I don't know if I will like the food", that sort of thing.

It's understandable when you know that her mother has never set foot on a plane in her life and the last flight her father had was the invasion of Germany many, many years ago. Even the offer to come over and travel to Turkey and back with them fell on deaf ears,

So, as with others we are still trying to get some family members  "onside", but it can be a very uphill task.  ??? ???

TC

Offline Menthol

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #47 on: October 13, 2013, 20:32:25 PM »
Oh I so recognise everything you have just said, TC.

Been trying to persuade my Dad to have the 'webby net' (as he calls it) for years. He is under the illusion that just actually going online will mean his every move is documented for the world to see. Whilst he is not entirely wrong about this, I know he is missing out on so much.

We had a bit of a breakthrough today though. He rang me because he wanted to know if he had won anything on the Lotto Raffle, as he has realised that no newspaper will be printing the very large amount of numbers in the Raffle draw. He now thinks he needs the webby net for this. Obviously I agreed with him. (My Dad is convinced it is only a matter of time before his turn to win the lottery happens).

So I will arrange for him to have broadband installed and find him a suitable laptop. This will be perfect for Skyping and for me to send him photos.

I am now going to work on getting him over to Turkey at least once.

Offline ArtyMar

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #48 on: October 13, 2013, 20:44:10 PM »
Good luck, Menty!

Offline tuzlachap

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Re: interfering family
« Reply #49 on: October 13, 2013, 22:38:06 PM »
It seems so "easy" for us of the  post war baby age to integrate with modern technology.

Well, let's face it, we all grew up with it and embraced bits and bytes ( I say this as a dedicated Grey techi and with apologiies to others not so savvy!!)

Yet, to embrace our aged relatives with the same entusiasm for the "lectrical" things we know and which they hate/fear is a modern "thing". It is one task I fear which will not be welcomed  by what I see as my "parent" peers.

I totally understand the reticence of older folks not to take on the computer age, after all when Bob Dylan went electrical, was not I offended?? Yes I was!!!!

So, what is the solution to helping our aged relatives understand what we perceive to be the benefits of our (and by this I mean those who have made the move) now living in Fethiye,Calis, Ovacik, Hisarano,OluDeniz or wherever! move to another lifestyle? I don't really know, perhaps some of you folks will have an opinion. Maybe not on this thread, perhaps another.

TC




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